It has been more than three years now that we here in the Archdiocese of Cincinnati have been working intensively with the findings of the National Study of Youth and Religion (NSYR), and here are some of the nuggets of wisdom we have uncovered along the way:

Parents are not the problem (but they are a huge part of the solution): church workers who rail at parents because they ‘stop, drop, and roll’ (stop at the parish, to drop off their children, and roll on to more important things) need to look more deeply at what is happening. As the venerable Pogo cartoon says . . .

We have met the enemy, and he is us: In this, Jesus invites us to remove the planks from our own eyes first, that we might have “eyes that see” what is really happening. For decades, for generations in fact, we have been communicating to parents both implicitly and explicitly to leave faith formation to the professionals—catechists, youth ministers, teachers, schools, nuns, priests, CCD, parish schools of religion, deacons, lay ministers, faith formation programs, and deacons—but not parents. We give lip service to the family as the domestic church, yet most of our parishes slice families into discrete pieces and serve up programs for the pieces, led by ‘the pros.’ As my good friend Dobie Moser frequently says, “This is far too important to leave to the professionals.” In other words, we need to unlearn years of habitual default ways of doing religious education and ministry based on the assumption that faith formation mainly happens at church and is done by almost anyone but parents. Sadly, this has led us to a . . .

Consumer/provider ministry model: Like just about everyone in this country, we have been shaped by a consumer culture, so we all too often default to a consumer/provider model without noticing. This is apparent in many of our programs and even our sacramental preparation. Think about it, if you attend certain sessions you ‘get’ a sacrament. Once you get the sacrament, you are done. Is not this far too often how it goes with confirmation, our ‘sacrament of graduation from church’? The NSYR powerfully points us in a very different direction, one that puts . . .

Parents and families first: Ironically, the NSYR confirms what all our catechetical documents say: parents are, bar none, the most powerful formators of their children’s faith. Nothing else even comes close. Some people say that we need to find better ways of partnering with parents. True, but not true enough. Parents and families need to be central and primary, so that we are supporting their efforts and not the other way around. Maybe we need to borrow Home Depot’s slogan, “You can do it. We can help.” Unfortunately, the lingo of ‘partnering’ can still leave us at the center of the faith project in young people’s lives, with parents pretty much sidelined until we need drivers, chaperones, and deep pockets to pay for mission trips and other big-ticket items.

So, What Must We Do?

We need nothing less than to rethink our assumptions about youth ministry, and strike out in some radically new directions. Below are some ideas that might help get our imaginations going.

• Sacramental preparation versus sacramental ministry
  The word preparation implies an endpoint, which typically is reception of a sacrament. Sacramental ministry suggests ongoing, seamless ministry efforts between, before, during, and after sacraments, and helps us live sacramental lives, e.g., not just going to Mass, but living the Eucharist.
• Rethink and restructure confirmation
  If you have joint or sole responsibility for confirmation, maybe you can start with this thought experiment: What would confirmation look like if it were centered in the family, with parents as principal catechists who are assisted, resourced, and mentored by church ministers? I am proud that we have some talented and courageous youth ministers here in our archdiocese doing just that.
• Do faith goals at graduation
  In seventh or eighth grade, meet with a young person and his/her parent(s) to explore: what are your faith goals at graduation from high school? To become a person of prayer? A person of Christian service and justice? A person engaged in the faith community? A person who gets what it means to live as a Catholic? Then map out a set of goals that parents, family, youth minister, and youth agree to work on—together.
• Conduct a youth ministry family impact study
  Read the USCCB document A Family Perspective in Church and Society and do a family impact study on your youth ministry program to learn what impact it is having on the families of the young people who participate. Even better, advocate for such a study to be done with your entire parish.
• Collaborate, collaborate, collaborate
  Sorry to break the news, but if our youth ministry is pretty much a solo/silo operation, we are probably more a problem than a solution. Granted, collaboration requires willing partners, and if that is the issue, use the NSYR research to build bridges of cooperation and collaboration. The research points all our ministries directly to parents and families—something all parish ministries share and have a big stake in.
• Strong Catholic Families: Strong Catholic Youth
  To bring this message to a broad audience of priests, diocesan leaders, other parish ministry leaders, and parents themselves, advocate to bring the Strong Catholic Families: Strong Catholic Youth training program to your diocese. Download More Information on the Program.